“Why doesn’t God answer my prayer?”  Let’s be honest: most of us have probably had this thought; many of us have probably even expressed it vocally.  Why are there times when it seems that God is distant, that He just doesn’t seem to hear my request, that He doesn’t answer?  Well, the truth is that God answers every single one of our prayers, but there are different answers He gives: yes, no, and wait.

Jesus taught his disciples about prayer and the need to be persistent in its practice.  But what is prayer?  Too often people equate prayer with simply asking God for favors.  Yes, this is part of it; but prayer is primarily about love.  Prayer is not about “getting our way” with God; it’s not about telling Him our needs; prayer is about coming to know the Lord more deeply and allowing our will to be conformed more perfectly to His.  Prayer is about conversation with Jesus, our best friend.  It’s about being with Him, not so much talking as much as coming to know Him and love Him more.

If we look at prayer from this perspective we can understand why God answers our prayers the way he does.  If we understand that prayer is about coming to know and love Jesus more, then we understand that the Lord only desires what is good for us, what will make us holy, and ultimately what will lead us to Heaven.

And so sometimes the Lord says “yes” to our prayer.  He says yes because He knows that it will help us to be holy.  Sometimes the Lord says “no” to our prayer.  This is more difficult to understand, especially, for example, when we are praying for someone to be healed of a sickness and that person dies.  We can’t pretend to understand exactly why the Lord allows such things, but we do believe that, if we allow Him, the Lord will bring good out of bad.  Finally, sometimes the Lord tells us to “wait.”  Why?  Because God knows us intimately.  He knows at what point in our lives we need particular graces.  He knows the Master Plan, and if we are willing to be taken up into that plan we will be at peace when God tells us to wait.

Jesus still wants us to be persistent in our prayer though because persistence leads us to a deeper understanding of the Divine Will.  Persistence in prayer leads us to know the Lord more intimately, to love Him more deeply, and to serve Him more fervently.  The greatest example of persistence in prayer is Jesus himself.

Recall when Jesus experienced his agony in the Garden of Gethsemane.  What did He pray?  “Father, if it be possible, let this cup pass from me.  Not my will but your will be done.”  He prayed this three times.  He was persistent with His Father.  But because He ended His prayer with “not my will but your will be done,” His persistence led Him to embrace the Divine Will.  In other words, the Father said, “My Son, I know that in your human nature you are afraid and hesitant, but it is my will that you offer this sacrifice for salvation of the world.”

Our prayer must be modeled on the prayer of Jesus.  We should always end our prayer with the words, “Not my will but your will be done.”  This transforms our prayer from simply wanting something from the Lord to openness to His love and embracing the Divine Will.  Yes, we should ask the Lord, we should seek the Lord, we should “knock” when we pray, but always remembering that, as our Father, He loves us and knows what is good for us.  Our role in prayer is to be like Mary: humbly receptive to his will, knowing it’s for our holiness and salvation.

P.S. I apologize for my absence from the blogosphere!  I’ve been getting used to a somewhat new and busier schedule.  I’ll try to post more frequently.

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