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A Prayerful Dialogue

Written by on June 3, 2010 - 6 Comments

“God is love” (1 John 4:8)

A troubled Soul: Lord, sometimes I have a hard time believing that you love me unconditionally.

Jesus: Why?

Soul: Because I have so many imperfections.  I feel weighed down by weaknesses.  I commit the same sins over and over.

Jesus: Your saying “I” a lot. Sounds like you’re focused more on yourself than on Me and My love for you.

Soul: There are just times when I don’t like myself very much.

Jesus: So your struggle is not really about My love for you; you’re having a hard time loving yourself.

Soul: I guess so.

Jesus: Don’t you believe my Word?

Soul: Remind me. Read more »

A Walk with the Lord

Written by on September 15, 2009 - 4 Comments

One evening last week, I decided to take a walk with the Lord.  The sky was moonlight and an autumn chill was in the air.  So after dinner I put a sweater on and walked meditatively around the seminary property.  I typically pray the examen in the late afternoon while sipping a fresh cup of hot coffee; but this day was different. I felt drawn to walk outside and talk with the Lord.  I contemplated Jesus walking by my side, His right arm around my shoulders, listening attentively to me sharing my day with Him.  Truthfully, it’s the type of prayer that several years ago I may have been tempted to call corny.  Have you ever noticed that some of the things you used to think were corny are actually things that you now do?

Nature Trails (main)What did I talk to the Lord about?  I just thanked Him for the many blessings that He’d given me that day.  I then spoke with Him about the events of my day and both the interior joys and struggles as well.  I told Him I saw His love in a student at Rhode Island College who was so happy to see me that she ran up and hugged me.  I laughed at myself as I told Him how aggravated I was as I sat in a meeting that I felt was wasting my time.  I even thanked Him for the new John Mayer CD I purchased that’s added pleasure to my driving.  I spoke to Him about the people that I had encountered during the day and I prayerfully offered them to Him, asking Him to bless them and to take care of their needs.  I asked His forgiveness for the times that I did not respond well to His grace, and I told Him that I would try to do better tomorrow.

I know He listened attentively to me as my heart spoke to His, and I tried to listen to Him when I asked how He was calling me to live in deeper holiness.  I experienced His presence, His encouragement, and His forgiveness.  I felt hopeful knowing that He loves me, despite my weakness and sin.  Yes, I had lived an imperfect day, but I was deeply aware that His love is greater than my sin.  He wasn’t condemning me; He was encouraging me to keep going, never to give up, and to live in deeper friendship with Him.

I don’t share this experience with you to hold myself up as a model of prayer; I share it with you to help you in your own prayer.  Prayer is about a heart to heart conversation with the Lord, our best friend.  Prayer is about walking with the Lord, our hearts speaking to His and His to ours.   Sometimes I think we complicate our prayer.  The Lord wants us to keep it simple.  He desires to have a deep friendship with us.

As a priest, I have had many people ask me how to pray.  In future posts I will continue to write about prayer, how to go deeper in our relationship with the Lord, and how to find him in our daily lives.  For now, if you desire a deeper relationship with the Lord, here is what I offer to you:

  • Find a quiet place in nature to take a walk with Him today
  • Find a quiet space in your house today to sit and speak with Him, heart to heart
  • If you’re driving by a church today, stop in and spend time in silence visiting with our Lord
  • If you’re at work, take a few minutes to slow down and speak to Him from your heart
  • If you’re driving today, keep the radio off for a little while and talk to the Lord from your heart; acknowledge that He is with you.

He’s always with us.  He always listens to us.  He’s our best friend.

Showing up for Prayer

Written by on September 10, 2009 - 2 Comments

Woody Allen once said something to the effect that eighty percent of success in life is simply about showing up.  We can say something similar about prayer.  If we desire a fruitful prayer life, then we must show up for it everyday.

imagesWhat do I mean?  In my previous posts I wrote about the Examen Prayer, a time set aside to reflect on God’s love and our response to it in our daily lives.  But how does one begin to pray the Examen?  How does one begin to pray at all?  The first step to prayer is simply showing up and acknowledging God’s loving presence.  St. Ignatius called this first step the time of “transition.”  Once again, I direct you to Fr. Gallagher’s excellent book that I referenced in my last post.

For most of us, this “transition” means taking a step away from the busyness of our day and consciously entering into God’s presence.  You see, the Lord does not need a time of transition; He is always present to us; His loving gaze is always upon us.  The transition is for us; we need to become consciously aware of His loving presence in our lives, especially if we’ve lost sight of Him during the day.  The Lord is always waiting to welcome us into His loving embrace.  So we need to make a conscious decision during the day to set time aside to enter into His presence.

What is the purpose of this transition?  Very simply, it is a time to become deeply aware of God’s love and presence.  His love should always be the focus of our prayer.  As we consciously show up for prayer, we acknowledge that He is always with us, that He loves us, that His arms and His heart are open to us and He is simply waiting to embrace us in His love.

Practically speaking, how do we make this transition?  First, we need a quiet space: a room, a church, nature, wherever we can be quiet with the Lord.  Personally, I like to sit in the chapel before the Blessed Sacrament or sit in my armchair with a hot cup of coffee freshly brewed from my Keurig coffee maker.  We then need to silence ourselves.  I try to focus on my breathing for a few moments and then simply acknowledge the Lord’s presence.  I try to become aware of His love, sometimes by saying, “I know that You are here with me, that You love me, that Your arms and Your heart are open to me ready to welcome me.”  Then for a few moments we simply bask in His loving presence.

That’s it.  That’s what it means to show up for prayer, to transition into prayer.  Once we consciously show up, then we can let the Lord do the rest.  The way we choose to transition and the length of time we spend on it will differ for each of us; but the important thing is that if we want to have a fruitful time of prayer then we must first consciously place ourselves in the Lord’s presence.

So, from now on when you go to pray, take some time to transition and become aware of the Lord’s loving presence.  That’s the best way to begin your prayer.

Emotions and the Spiritual Life

Written by on September 5, 2009 - 1 Comment

Emotions are like the tide: they change every day.  We must be careful then not to base our spiritual lives on our emotions.  We must also take care not to base our decisions upon our feelings.

Every day we can experience both positive and negative emotions, and we can allow both types of emotions to affect our relationship with the Lord.  For example, if we are peaceful during the day, we can allow it to lead us more deeply into the Lord’s presence and experience spiritual consolation; however, if we are angry we may choose to distance ourselves from Him thus choosing spiritual desolation.  The challenge for us is to live on a deeper spiritual level than our emotions.  The good news is that there is a prayerful way to get to that level and to be more discerning about how our emotions affect our spiritual life.

St. Ignatius of Loyola made popular a way to pray that can help us to discern the daily spiritual movements of our hearts so that we can be more attentive to the presence and action of the Holy Spirit in our lives.  It is called the Examen Prayer.  The Examen Prayer is simply a time to sit in God’s presence, thank Him for the blessings of the day, ask Him to help us see how we have lived in His presence, receive His forgiveness, and make a concrete resolution to live a holier life the following day. For those who want to learn about this prayer, I encourage you to read Fr. Timothy Gallagher’s book The Examen Prayer. It’s a great book for those who want to go deeper in the spiritual life.  I’m actually reading it for the second time.

One of the benefits of the Examen Prayer is that it helps us to be more attentive to the promptings of the Lord, and also to be more conscious of the movements of our hearts that are contrary to the Spirit of the Lord.  Every day the Lord tries to draw us closer to Him.  You may have had the experience of feeling drawn to silence during the day or maybe even experiencing God’s presence and peace as you watched the sunset.  These moments are gifts from the Lord and are His way of drawing us closer to His heart.

The truth is that we are much more than our emotions.  Amidst the daily emotional fluctuations there is the deeper reality of the Lord’s presence in our souls.  But if we do not take time every day to enter prayerfully into His presence then we will inevitably allow our negative emotions to dictate our spiritual lives and our decisions.  We will be ruled by what we feel rather than by who we are: children of God.

There is a great Cherokee Legend that illustrates this point perfectly. An old Cherokee is teaching his grandson about life.  “A fight is going on inside me,” he said to the boy.  “It is a terrible fight and it is between two wolves. One is evil – he is anger, envy, sorrow, regret, greed, arrogance, self-pity, guilt, resentment, inferiority, lies, false pride, superiority, and ego.”  He continued, “The other is good – he is joy, peace, love, hope, serenity, humility, kindness, benevolence, empathy, generosity, truth, compassion, and faith. The same fight is going on inside you – and inside every other person, too.”

The grandson thought about it for a minute and then asked his grandfather, “Which wolf will win?”

The old Cherokee simply replied, “The one you feed.”

I’ll go more in depth with the Examen Prayer in future posts.  For now, take some time to sit in silence and feed your relationship with the Lord.  Review with Him the movements of your heart.  Have you been angry or sad?  How have you allowed your emotions to dictate your spiritual life and your decisions today?  Acknowledge the graces that the Lord has given to you today. Speak to the Lord about the movements of your heart and ask him for the grace to reject the bad and to choose his love and his peace.  Allow the Lord’s peace to enter your heart and focus on the fruits of the Holy Spirit so that they will begin to grow in you.

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