As a priest, people often talk to me about their lives and their problems. Inevitably, I ask them how their relationship with God is. I can usually tell from their response if they have a long distance relationship with the Lord. The language they use reveals that a deep, personal friendship with God is somewhat of a foreign concept. For example, they’ll say, “Well, I say my prayers at night before I go to bed,” or “I go to church,” or, my favorite, “I talk to the Big Guy in the sky; we’re tight.”
Great. Saying prayers at night and going to church is a wonderful way to deepen our relationship with God. But saying prayers at night and going to church does not necessarily mean that we have a deep, personal friendship with the Lord either. And as for “talking to the Big Guy in the sky,” that’s simply not Christian spirituality; it’s deism. In fact, therein lay the problem: too many people think God is “out there somewhere” rather than very close to them.
We learn so much from our parents, good habits and bad. Maybe that’s why I’ve always been conflicted about waking up in the morning. On the one hand, my father has always risen before the sun; he’s the earliest riser in the family. On the other hand, my mother, well, that’s a different story. Although she gets up early for work, the truth is that on the weekends she has the ability to sleep until…let’s just say she can sleep pretty late. Honestly, I think I inherited my mom’s sleeping gene. I’ve always loved sleep, and getting out of bed has tended to be an effort for me; yet, I have continually made an effort to get up early. Therein lay the conflict.
Above my desk where my Macbook, printer, and lamp share their home, hangs a large framed print of one of my favorite saints, Ignatius of Loyola. He’s dressed in a red chasuble and stole, the traditional vestments for the celebration of Mass. His eyes gaze heavenward; there is a glow on his face and an aura of light around his head. His right arm is bent upward; his hand, fingers and palm also pointing upward, is open in a gesture of praise. His left hand rests on the top of an open book and on the left page are written the words “Ad Majorem Dei Gloriam”: For the greater glory of God. It is the image of a saint, an image of holiness.
To be fully alive is not equivalent to the modern notion of “living life to its fullest.” When many people talk about living life to its fullest, what they really mean is that we should indulge in as many pleasures as possible, pamper ourselves, and just be comfortable. Not that there’s anything wrong with pampering ourselves once in a while, but that’s not exactly what St. Irenaues meant.
There’s a reason why St. Ignatius encouraged us to make gratitude the first step in the examen prayer: when we thank the Giver of the gifts, our love for Him increases. Our awareness of His loving presence deepens, and we become more convinced that He’s always with us. There’s not a day that goes by without the Lord showering blessings upon us—we simply need to have the spiritual eyes to see. One of the reasons it’s important to acquire the habit of seeing the daily gifts He gives us is so that when we encounter trials, when we experience the fragility of life, we will not lose sight of His loving care for us.
Have you noticed the laughter of a child?
What did I talk to the Lord about? I just thanked Him for the many blessings that He’d given me that day. I then spoke with Him about the events of my day and both the interior joys and struggles as well. I told Him I saw His love in a student at Rhode Island College who was so happy to see me that she ran up and hugged me. I laughed at myself as I told Him how aggravated I was as I sat in a meeting that I felt was wasting my time. I even thanked Him for the new John Mayer CD I purchased that’s added pleasure to my driving. I spoke to Him about the people that I had encountered during the day and I prayerfully offered them to Him, asking Him to bless them and to take care of their needs. I asked His forgiveness for the times that I did not respond well to His grace, and I told Him that I would try to do better tomorrow.
If you’ve read my previous posts, you may have guessed that one of my favorite saints is Ignatius of Loyola, the great founder of the Society of Jesus (also known as the Jesuits). Ignatius was born in Spain in 1491. He was a soldier in the Spanish army before he experienced a profound conversion to Christ at the age of 30.
What do I mean? In my previous posts I wrote about the Examen Prayer, a time set aside to reflect on God’s love and our response to it in our daily lives. But how does one begin to pray the Examen? How does one begin to pray at all? The first step to prayer is simply showing up and acknowledging God’s loving presence. St. Ignatius called this first step the time of “transition.” Once again, I direct you to 
